an amateur writer, photographer, and designer; a sleeper, a reader, a walker, a liver (not in the organ-sense).
loves: fruit, witty remarks, music, dwarf tulips, light sage green, and watching the sky.
can't survive without: water, sunshine, love, my family & friends.
Today, I finished my last assignment of senior year. I have no excuses left, and only three weeks left to go. Let’s do this.
*I crossed out the ones that just aren’t going to happen / passed / whatever. And added ones that I wanted to do.
[x ] Sledding down Widener steps
[ ] Ice Skating, Frog Pond
[x] Attend morning services (multiple times)
[ ] Attend Shabbat services
[ ] Attend church services
[ ] Go to Open Houses in every house. Not the Quad. [x] Mather [ ] Dunster [x] Lev [x] Quincy [x] Adams [ ] Lowell [ ] Eliot [ ] Kirkland [ ] Winthrop
[x] Take a picture with the Rhinos
[ ] Go to the top of Memorial Hall
[x] Watch a HWBB game
[ ] Stargaze from the observatory
[x] See HPT165, preferably on Ladies Night
[x] Attend a HPT Roast (Marion Cotillard!)
[ ] See your fourth Froshsical
[x] See DHO or LHO
[ ] Pee on John Harvard
[ ] Stacks.
[x] Primal Scream
[x] Learn how to Salsa, go dancing
[ ] Jump off weeks bridge
[x] Find another hidden room
[ ] A crossword puzzle
[ ] Watch LOTR.
[x] Quincy Pottery
[ ] On a hike
[ ] On FOP-reunion outing.
[ ] ICA
[ ] BSO concert
[ ] Indie artist concert.
[ ] Boston Ballet
[ ] Quincy Market
[ ] Red Sox Game @ Fenway
[ ] Walk the Freedom Trail
[ ] Arnold Arboretum
[x] Walden Pond
[x] Rock climbing
[ ] Have dinner with a Professor
[x] Attend a psych lecture
[x] Take a WGS Seminar
[x] Turn in a thesis
[x] Go to Office Hours for a class I’m not taking
[x] Take a class pass/fail or audited (?!!) (Don’t think this will actually happen)
[ ] Bon Me
[x] The Butcher Shop
[ ] East by Northeast
[x] Myers & Chang
[ ] Asta
[ ] Salts
[ ] Brunch at Henrietta’s
[ ] Stage L’Espalier Pastry
They say there’s a moment, where it hits you, and you cry.
The last (official) OAASIS event came and went; house formals came and went; the last day of classes. I almost cried, not because it was my last lecture but because it was my professor’s last lecture, and suddenly I didn’t know whether I wanted to be a doctor anymore (more on that some other day). I keep wondering - when will be my last meal in Annenberg, my last time in the Science center, the last time I go into lab.
But as I was walking through the yard this evening, I paused to look up at the statue of John Harvard, and let my fingers brush the ropes that are trying to allow the grass to grow in time for commencement. For the first time, I envisioned myself in cap and gown, imagining my gown dragging the floor, adjusting my hair to fit under its cap. And as I walked into Stoughton North for my last study break as a PAF, and was greeted with hugs from freshmen who have somehow grown so much in just a year, it started to hit me.
The likelihood that I will never see many of these PAFees again? pretty high. But as I joked with my linkmate that I’d never see him again, except maybe at a wedding, I felt that sense of terror - because what I’m afraid to lose isn’t really the swipe access, or the long nights struggling to write papers. What I’m afraid of is that he’ll be in Uganda, I’ll be in the UK; someone else is in Chicago, NYC…and unless they are in my home bases, when will I find the time to travel to these other places, to see these people I care so much about?
But on our walk back - to Lamont to drop of Jake, to Starbucks for coffee, and all the way back to Mather - he assured me that this, this is not the end. And I’m just going to have to try to believe that. Because these friendships that we have made are too good to end today.
It’s too early to look ahead, too late to live in the past; so here’s to a last few weeks of being present …
And dream how wonderful your life will be. Lullaby, Billy Joel.
long-overdue talks with K and S; drinks with the beautiful sisters of OAASIS at Russell, then Park; then Tasty Burger. morning service, M speaking about music, K’s wonderful cards and gift; a long walk to the chapel, a quiet morning reflecting, walking, writing; flowers from 姐, and a wonderful lunch at Flour Bakery; blue moons and guitar playing with J; burdicks delicious chocolate cake and fruit tart from J; watching singing in the rain; Crema talks in reconciliation (forgiving, because who fights or argues on their birthday); dinner with Y and 姐, then catching up with RCE at the Arts First plaza; beautiful flowers and a wonderful card from K. And last of all, the most incredible gift from my sister.
A day spent exactly how I wanted to; with no expectations as to how it would go, showered with love from wonderful people, time taken to be alone and reflect. If this is getting older, I think I’m okay with it.
Here’s to being 23 (:
four springs wandering the yard, the square, the river, mark four years here. spring, with all of its blooms and sunshine and chirping birds, gives way to commencement - and a great unknown.
why does everything end, just as it begins to be beautiful?